The same again...

No.
It's ok, really.
No.
I promise, it's fine. I know it was supposed to happen this way..
Yes?
Oh yes, no, of course. If it was meant to be.. well..
..well... I guess the timing would be different.
Yea, everything would fit.
I dunno..
I guess I think so..
No.
No, your right.. sacrifices are essential.
Yes, yes, but..
But..
But.. I'm just too selfish right now..
No.
I know, it's the sad truth of things.
I'm just not ready.
Not ready for what?
For this.. for all of this..
I have to do me.
Live me.
Be me.
See all there is and find out what it is I'm really looking for.
Yes.
Yes of course..
Yes of course I love you.
No.
No, of course...
No, of course it's not fair.
I know.
I know I messed up.
I always mess up.
Always?
Yes, yes it's happened before.
No.
No, I guess I haven't...
No, I guess I haven't learned just yet...
Yea I know..
I know I was wrong.
I know I am wrong..
Yea, I know I hurt you.
Yes.
Yes, I am..
I am sorry.
I am...
so so sorry..
It's just.
well...
You deserve..
Yes.
You deserve so much better than me.

unmoved

That deep quick, undecided, indescribable, misguided feeling.. a connection of absolute force. One that penetrates the very confines of the most rudimentary piece of your inter substance. The essence of your being, pro say. Or maybe just the link between what makes you, you and what makes you not them.. or feel them.. or want or desire or however it is your mind encapsulates and processes those eradicated, misconceptions disguised as a "feeling."

A so called response to an undirected motion in a direction far out of what makes sense to your broad boring senseless mind that believes it knows and recollects all things.

What is this. How is this. Can this even be...

A thick trickle of water in an empty jar. A cool stone upon the overheated skin of a flushed face. The cool ominous breeze of a quick assessing storm.

Has nothing, reads nothing, is nothing...

In the indescribable senses that build and break and conquer those inter workings of the mind, body, soul..

what is this? how can this be?

and yet.

I sit.

Unsensitized. unmoved. unrendered. by what should have shaken me so deep to the core that i myself am balanced... and yet.. nothing.

Cool wind, warm breeze, thick essence, dark trees.. and I stay untouched and unscathed in the deep dark confines of my rudimentary brain.

I should be moved. recked. destroyed. shaken. passionate.

should be struck down in the senseless face of what is made real by my own reactions to unreactions to nonsensical acts of indescribable passions in a mainstream indirected sense to hope and feel

something.

anything.

and yet,

I sit.

unmoved.