the enemy

Pot calling the kettle black
you told me go,
but i came back.
watch you fall,
waiting to attack.

its not your fault i'm the enemy.
you didn't know this was part of me.
the deep rush that creates the sea.
something far beoyend.
something down too deep.
i took your turn,
and this won't keep.
it's not your fault i'm the enemy.

clean floor in a dirty room.
i washed the walls but the mold formed.
keep quite and i might stay.
say too much and i run away.

it's not your fualt i'm the enemy.
i tried to change,
but it's part of me.
take my hand but know it bleeds.
hid the wood
but the scratch is new.
something sacred that still runs through.

it's not your fault i'm the enemy.
heard you wisper
now i have to leave.
make my stay.
please hold on to me.
the currents strong
and i am weak.

it's not your fault i'm the enemy.
should have warned you this was part of me.
should have known you couldn't set me free...

always running

breath coming in short blasts.
mind stuck on yet anouther of the same paths.

i wait. not sure what to think or feel or care about. who to be and who not to be. to run away or to come back.. just constant thoughts and messages traveling so fast that sometimes i finally realize what it is in my mind that drives me.

makes me move.

so the reason i am so tired.. always.. so exuastaned.. so moving.. so constant.
is but the fact that i am truly always running..

never standing still.. for even at night

when my body lays its limbs apon the bed and closes it's eyes, the motion only moves to my mind.

like a distnat race. hear the voices. feel the surge.

and i can't even keep pace anymore. i don't even want to chase anymore.

but i do and i take off.

wake up running.

fall asleep running.

stand still.. running.

on it goes. fast and slow. and i realize.
the problem.

is i can't keep up. can't keep up with the pace that i have set for the rest of myself.

and it's so intense i can't undertsand it. like two differnt bodys.

two differnt mionds anmd i can't type and think and spell and run and run and runm.

inconsipicous

When you pass me on the street
when you pass me on the corner.
will you remember what i look like,
will you remember it was over.

Do you catch a wiff of perfume,
and wonder if i'm there.
Do you taste a choclate kiss,
close your eyes and think of me.

was there ever any question?
did you think that we could be?
is it possible you loved me...
or was that only me?

no i watch you from the shadow.
but it isn't even you.
it's the look of somone similar,
the taste of something new.

would i know it if you passed me.
would i recognize your voice.
in the colors i see memories,
but they are hidden by your choice.

now i beg you not to come near.
yet i watch for you each night.
for when i lie next to him.
i pretend he is you...
and you are mine.