Us

Do you think we could be us again?
The us who talk and laugh and cuddle
and spend time together
who make time for each other?

Do you think we could get there?
Learn to take a leap of faith
to decide to hold hands
near and far
no matter the distance
make plans
to land on the same
star
watching the world turn
like it belongs
to us?

Do you think we have it in us?
The love can get us there,
we could sift through all
the hurtles
blocking what
really matters,
clear away the grey
to see color, again?

Do you think we can?

I do.

truly

you can touch
the skin i'm in
without ever touching
me
too deep to feel
a pain
reverberating
softly
souls
lost too far
beneath the shield
how can i ask
you to love
me
when i have no
idea
how to love
you back
truly
it's better
that you
didn't fight for
me
truly
i should be
grateful
to wear your
love as an
echo
deep
deep
deep
down
beneath
the confines
of my soul
where scares
fill holes
so deep
they send chills
far below
ripples
truly
it's better
this way
truly
i'm a house
locked
boarded up
truly
it's better
dear
truly
on the surface
walk away

It's Fine

If you love me
do something about it
I'm an inconclusive mind
whisper me some answers
I'm struggling to find
show me all my questions
are concerns lost
overtime
show me
show me
you loved me
all along

and if you don't...
it's fine
and if you don't...
it's fine
You'll go your way
and I'll go mine
yes, if you don't...
it's fine.

But, if you love me
say it
say it now
now
while there's time
show me
show me
I am yours
and you are
mine
say it.

and if you don't...
it's fine.

but, if you do...
now, now is the time.

A fight in You

Stand there
in the middle
of the flame
I mean the
hottest part
blue tips
lick the center
of my illogical
brain

can you feel it?
are we still sitting
in the eye
whirling pieces
I see them
flying by

I want to
hold you
close
let the chaos
subside

But, we will
have to fight
to get through
the other side

and, I don't see
a fight in you
burnt to pieces
skin unglued

no, no
I don't see
a fight in you

hold me tight
prove me wrong
let me see
a fight
in you

let me see
a fight in you

as the flames
lick our hearts
red, orange, blue
please please
have a fight
in you

a fight
a fight
a fight
in you

The Turn Is Mine

Am I confused?
you ask
condescendingly
maybe
no

The answer is no
for once
I know
I know what
I want

It won't be reciprocated
It won't be convenient
It will shock you
out of character
decision
me?
Who is this?

Get out of my way
give me a kiss
Here's my hand
flush of queens
I don't know, yet
If they win
or loose
in this type of game

Deal your deck
I always let you
no no no
I know this time
I know this time

the turn is mine
the turn is mine

I just need to know

Touch me with your finger tips.
Peel my skin off of my bones.
I feel the layer of protection,
holding down my soul.
I look into your eyes,
searching...

Can you see me?
Can you feel my mind?
Is there anything between us?
Or, has your heart gone blind...
I can't feel your intention.
I can't speculate your light.
Pulled in so many directions,
I still come back to you
again
and again
and again
and again
and again.

Tell me what you want from me.
Just say leave,
and I will go.
Hold my hand
and say to stay,
I need a direction
I need to know.

It's up to me
to make a move
and I won't
stuck
frozen
skin
and
bones
Give me a direction
I just need
to know
Give me a direction
I just need
to know.

Are you mine?
Am I yours?
Will we be us?
Or...
Do I finally
let you go?

Give me a direction
I just
need to
know

Vision 20-20

I haven't yet discovered
the weight within my chest
while it always grounds me
it also holds me back

feel the metal tang
a taste that cuts like glass
I went looking for an answer
and fell into the past

a ride to the inevitable
a milky black disguise
and how I used to assume
the world was in your eyes

now I know the truth
it's only seen
through mine

vision 20-20
but, don't get up to close
the further you are looking
the greater and the most

spread wings
and anchored heels
velocity strikes back
and all that I can do right now
is wait for the attack

I feel the inner rising
the outer failing knell
the weight can't hold my fire
erupt
erupt
I will.
 

To Begin

You can speak freely
the commentary's fine
it flows straight through
my atmosphere
illuminates my mind

I'm not sure how to feel
the wind blows
a chill
yet, the sun
on my skin
makes me think
maybe,
I'll just stay still

The warmth engulfs my being
as a shiver shakes my skin
As if I may be ending
Right as I begin

Who guesses where life takes you?
A shifting shaking path
Right as I'm stepping forward
the surface rocks me back

Am I to learn a lesson?
Did I leave something behind?
Will you stay here with me?
Will I change my mind?

The warmth caresses
over me
sinking into my frigid skin
Could it be that I am ending?
Just simply to begin?

Bright Noise

What will it be the sound so loudly waking memories of a life not yet defined yet so often forgotten why In the essence of a silent room must I seek the noise that haunts my every day dream night in shining armor It turns out, I really just don’t need you or anyone else to save me from the prison I create for my own heart let me free my mind inspiring wishes no one else knows or sees in the essence of a light barely shinning yet so damn bright 

no one 

Can quite the sound

Give and Take

"I watch you give and give

to takers

and take and take

from givers"

-Says someone who keeps giving me something I don't want.

What defines you? 

What makes you run 

headlong into the wall, 

again and again

thinking, 

maybe

someday

it will 

somehow

become an open door.  

If you bring me something

I didn't ask for

is it really

for me?

If you are giving for you,

are you the giver

after all. 

-Something to ponder while you fall asleep - still kicking yourself for your faults. 

Maybe the world will be 

square, tomorrow

and I can just walk

right off the edge

into the unknown.

How freeing.

How freeing would that be

just to know

how far the edge

how far it goes. 

She wants the sky.

All she wanted was the god damn sky.
And, the god damn sky was black.
Tell, tell me...
what is it that is so wrong with that.

You think you'd want the crystal blue,
a wisp of cloud
a sunrise
candy coated
powder
enough to please the eye
orange, yellow, purple, blue
indigo, indigo, too.

Or maybe, just a shinning star,
a thousand
even one
a moon that sizes up the earth
waning into the clear.
Just a sliver left of light
enough to know you're here.

But, oh she'd take it now.
Dark and desolate
At least it has potential
somewhere out there
so vast
at least,
at least it does have that.